Wanna know one of the secrets to a loving and long-lasting relationship? 🤫 Doing the little things! Small gestures such as leaving your partner a romantic love note, or holding their hand during a conflict. Gestures such as these help couples form a safe and secure bond, building genuine trust and intimacy.
It’s extra important for remarried couples to intentionally make time to express positive emotions and appreciation to each other due to how complex their lives can be. The demands of daily “blended” family life seem to leave minimal little time left over for fun and relaxed activities. However, making use of small gestures and daily rituals can help couples strengthen their connection.
Research reveals that the secret to long-lasting love is through practicing small gestures; things like making your partner a cup of coffee, or cleaning up after a meal without being asked to do so.
All marriages go through trying times and little Love Hacks are a great way to sustain couples and help them ignite passion in their relationship.
So, here are 6 Ways Remarried Couples Can Make The Little Things Count in their relationship:
❤️ Help Each Other
This can include helping your partner make plans, run errands, complete tasks, or effectively manage their time. These helpful and positive actions lead to interdependence, as partners begin to coordinate their behaviour to try to realise their long-term goals together.
❤️ Find Ways To Lower One Another’s Stress
Work problems, financial struggles, or family issues are all things that can distance a couple away from one another. Couples who can respond to each other’s stress in a way that is calming rather than explosive have a higher chance of making it through more difficult times. Listen to your spouse, and express empathy without offering judgements or instant solutions. Why not bring them a cup of tea or give them a little shoulder rub?
❤️ Set Aside Time for A Daily Ritual Together
Ideally, you should be spending at least 20 minutes per day doing things to show love, compassion, and kindness to your significant other. Get familiar with the schedules of your other family members, and figure out whether you can find a perfect time to spend some one-on-one alone time with your partner. This might mean eating one meal a day without screen time to enhance communication, or enjoying a short sunset walk together.
❤️ Speak Kindly, Apologise, and Forgive
Would you prefer to go to sleep feeling angry, or would you rather be cuddling with your partner trying to repair things after having had an argument? Studies reveal that couples who apologise when they’ve hurt their spouse’s feelings — even unintentionally — and practice forgiveness, have a more successful relationship. It might sound obvious, but it’s easy to forget. Remember: forgiveness works.
❤️ Kiss and Touch for Longer
Giving each other genuine and lingering kisses daily will increase your emotional and physical intimacy with your partner. Physical contact releases oxytocin — which is the “bonding hormone” — and can improve your mood, helping you to stay calmer. Holding hands, hugging, touching, and kissing can drastically reduce your stress hormones and increase your sense of relationship satisfaction.
❤️ Show Love Through Your Actions
The research team at Penn State University found that actions matter the most when it comes to showing and expressing love. “We found that behavioural actions — rather than purely verbal expressions — triggered more consensus as indicators of love.” For example, making the bed in the morning could actually be more important than giving your partner a compliment. Of course you have to judge the situation accordingly, but in many cases, actions speak louder than words.
As Dr. John Gottman contends, the little, intentional moments have far more power than the isolated, over-the-top gestures when it comes to creating and sustaining a love that lasts.
In short, it’s about doing the small things frequently! Of course, celebrating anniversaries, birthdays, and other family events is important, but also remember to appreciate the little things. If you truly want to feel alive in your remarriage, you need to put in that extra effort to spend quality time together — with an emphasis on small gestures of love! 😉